There is nothing wrong with being busy. Most business people are always
looking for new or better business, and to be busy can mean that your
business is successful.
But, looking busy has its downfalls.
The more your clients see you looking busy, the more they may want to
protect their own relationship with you. They may, either consciously or
unconsciously, want to protect both you and themselves by not making you
busier with more referrals.
Here's why. Your clients want to protect you so that your life doesn't
get any more hectic than it already is. They know that if they give you
another referral, you will only have more work to do. And, if they were to
give you, say, three to five new referrals, not only would your life be
made worse, you may not even be able to get to those new people in a
timely manner—which would make you feel bad, the referrals feel bad, and
your client feel bad.
Your busyness may even be setting up your best clients to be "sitting
ducks" for your competition. The more your clients are concerned about
your busyness, the more likely it is they won't want to impose on you, for
example, by calling with questions about their account. So-o-o, they may
even be relieved to find someone else—anyone else—who is apparently
willing to take the time to answer a few questions for them. If that
someone else is your competition, he is getting a chance to demonstrate
not only competence to your clients but also that he has the time to
really work with your clients.
In addition to protecting you, your clients may feel—again, perhaps
unconsciously—that they need to protect themselves. If you don't have time
for a relationship with them, you may not have the time to do a great
job—to fully manage their account. So, they watch your results more
carefully. And, they don't commit new money to you.
Your clients also may be thinking, “If you barely have time for me
already, I don't want to make it worse by having to share you with anyone
else.” So, when you do ask your clients for referrals, they tell you
they'll think about it. Or, they give you the names of people who won't
take up much of your time—either by becoming clients at all or by being
the type of client who hasn't enough assets to require much management.
Either way—whether your good clients mostly are protecting you or
themselves—the result of your busyness can be a less-than-optimal
relationship with your major clients (if not the loss of them altogether)
as well as a lack of referrals to potential good clients.
And yet we know that it makes more sense for us to take care of our
existing clients than it does for us to try to find new clients. One of
the most effective ways to take care of those clients is by sending the
message that they are important to us. We make others feel important—and
connected—to us by taking the time to pay attention to them.
Now the question becomes, “With all of the things I already have to do,
how do I send the message to my clients that I have time for them?”
The following ten ideas won't solve all of the busyness challenges you
may be facing, but they will give you some practical ideas you can use
immediately. Many of these ideas are from Dr. Max Dixon, who, over the
past 36 years, has established himself in both the public speaking and
entertainment industries as one of the world's leading coaches on
communicating more clearly and powerfully.
1. Anyone can look good when things are going well. It's when things
are falling apart that you get challenged. So, first let me give you
something to do when "Murphy's law" is operating in overdrive. Do what
great athletes do: Create a ritual. When you watch a tennis match between
great tennis players, you may notice how, between points, each player
tends to examine or adjust the strings of her tennis racket. Their strings
don't need to be adjusted; it's just that the best tennis players in the
world have trained themselves to perform a ritual between points so they
can maintain their concentration regardless of what is going on in the
match.
Pitchers and batters in baseball use the same sorts of rituals. Runners
in track and field, free-throw shooters in basketball—all use rituals, as
do athletes in nearly every other sport that requires concentration under
stress. So, let's create a ritual for you that can help you “model”
reflection, patience, and time:
Just be silent for a moment . . .ten seconds. That's the ritual! Before
any appointment, simply stop what you are doing, and sit or stand silently
for a full ten seconds. At the end of that ten seconds, take one deep
breath and then let it out. Then proceed with your appointment.
2. The next step is to perform some kind of slow behavior. It may be as
simple as standing up and walking over to the person, taking a moment to
shake his hand while gaining eye contact. The key is to do it slowly and
deliberately. Spending even two extra seconds here will send the message
that you consider this person important.
3. Most people who are in a hurry tend, when speaking, to emphasize the
consonants of the words. This makes their language sound unemotional,
clipped. So, as you talk with your client, you'll want to enunciate your
vowels. By making sure that you sound out the vowels when you speak, you
will help to create two results. The first is that you'll express yourself
with more passion and compassion: Your comments will take on more "life."
Both you and your client will be more emotionally involved in the
conversation, and you'll tend to feel more connected with each other.
The second result is that your word speed will tend to slow down, which
will give the conversation more impact and make it feel more complete.
This compounds the involvement both of you will feel.
4. Carry out your conversations at a different location from your desk.
I realize that not all your conversations are full-blown appointments—many
of them occur simply while walking past someone. The suggestion here,
however, is that you have your important conversations at a location other
than from behind your regular desk. If someone steps into your office and
asks a question, stand up or move around and sit on the front edge of your
desk. For formal appointments, it will be worth your effort to move away
from your desk and sit with your client at a different location.
5. As long ago as 1936, Dale Carnegie wrote in How to Win Friends and
Influence People that one of the ways to build good relationships is to
"Be a good listener, encourage other people to talk about themselves."
This is only as effective, however, as your ability to listen to their
answers.
I am often asked for coaching and advice on various subjects. For
years, I would respond first by asking enough questions to get a rough
idea of what the person wanted, and then I would launch into a summary of
the different solutions that might solve the problem. Usually, after I had
talked myself out, people would respond by saying, “Well, I was thinking
about doing such-and-such. What do you think?" They already had the
answer! They didn't want any new information; they just wanted their
answer confirmed by my experience.
Now when people ask me what I think they should do about a problem or
challenge, I like to ask them, "What do you think you'd do?" Then, all I
normally have to do is listen to the answer they have already thought out.
6. Even though you may ask your clients a lot of questions and listen
to the answers, your conversation may still take on the air of "let's get
this over with." Do you responding to the other person before he or she
has completed saying what he wanted to say. To make sure that you maintain
an air of reflection with your clients, do as Max Dixon suggests: Stay
with them “a beat beyond.”
This means that before you respond, you wait for at least two full
seconds after the other person stops speaking. This ensures he has
finished; it also helps you "model reflection," and it gives you time to
consider your response. One of my good friends, Bill Bachrach, tends to
put his telephone on "mute" during conference calls so he can concentrate
more fully on what the other people are saying. If a question is directed
at him, he needs to release the "mute" button before he can speak. He says
this has helped him tremendously because he has that brief moment to
collect his thoughts before he speaks.
7. When your clients leave your office, walk with them to the door or
lobby. This simple gesture of respect will help you in several ways.
First, it demonstrates you have the time to be respectful—that your client
is important enough to you to be worthy of being "walked out." Second, it
gives you another opportunity to shake her hand and maintain the
connection you've created with her. And third, it gives you time to think
about your next task or appointment as you walk back to your desk: You'll
think more clearly than if you’d remained sitting in your office; and the
time spent organizing your thoughts should be about the same regardless of
whether you are sitting at your desk or walking back to your office.
Those first seven suggestions are “tactically” oriented; they are ideas
you can use immediately. The following three suggestions are more
strategic in nature: Some initiative and planning will be required if you
are to get the best results.
8. Take a life-management program. When you clearly understand what you
value most, you'll tend to express those values and characteristics in
your dealings with others.
9. Write out a description of your ideal client, and then jettison
those clients who are farthest away from your ideal. Most business
professionals are afraid to give up any clients at all, yet there is an
important reason to do so. The reason is "Parkinson's Constant."
Parkinson's Constant holds that the job expands to fill the time allowed.
That is, we will take whatever time we have at our disposal to complete
the work we have to do. So, if you have 500 clients, you'll fill your days
taking care of those 500 clients; if you had only 300 clients, you would
fill your days taking care of those 300 clients. It doesn't matter how
many clients you have—you'll always seem to be about as busy as you are
now. So you might as well be busy taking care of, or looking for, those
clients who fit your ideal.
10. Create a system that lets your clients know, when they least expect
it, that they are important to you. Have you ever received a letter of
appreciation or a gift that you kept for a long time? How did you feel
when you received it? How long did you keep it? We are talking about about
personalized letters, cards, and gifts sent at times your clients or
prospects don't expect them, which forces them to pay attention to the
fact they are important to you.
By simply writing and sending one card of appreciation a day to one of
your clients you’re sending a message that you’re willing to take the time
for them.
Using these ten suggestions can help you send the strong message to
your clients that they belong to a very special group—a group of people
whom you always have time for, because they are important to you and
because they are worthy of being treated with the dignity the human spirit
deserves.
Doug Carter, with Jenni Green, is the author of
Clients Forever: How Your Clients Can Build Your Business
(McGraw-Hill). A
sales professional and trainer for more than twenty-five years, he is the
founder and CEO of Carter International Training and Development Company.
Learn more at www.dougcarter.com or
dcarter@clientsforevercoaching.com.
